Anyone who isn’t a white male has had this experience. They work extremely hard, put their all into something, and land that coveted position. It took years of blood, sweat, and tears – including long hours of studying, days of interview prep, and working grunt jobs to gain experience.
They’re thrilled – they finally scored their dream job, the thing they’ve been toiling for so long, and some dude bro who put in a quarter of the effort derides their accomplishment as an EEO quota.
The implication is clear. You didn’t deserve the accomplishment you worked so hard to achieve. You only got it because of your gender or the color of your skin. The mediocre white guy would have gotten it if it weren’t for the quota. You’re stealing their jobs.
She Gets a Prestigious Interview
It happens all the time. One woman came to the internet to share her frustration after male peers claimed she only got an interview due to her gender.
The Original Poster (OP) shared that she’s been working extremely hard to learn and grow in her field. She’s still in school and studying in a male-dominated field.
After she scored a highly sought-after interview, her male classmate scoffed and claimed she only got the interview because she was a woman.
OP vented into the void of the internet because she’s tired of all her accomplishments getting downplayed due to her gender.
“I’m here to fill a special woman quota, maybe a sort of “see we hire women” and not maybe because I might actually be smart?” OP asked. “I might actually have the same level of intelligence as man??? Shocking, I know,” she exclaimed.
Calling It Out Makes It Worse
As most folks who’ve experienced this type of discrimination know, calling it out only makes it worse. OP told the offending party that his assumption was sexist, but rather than examine his own views, he dug in deeper and called her “crazy” and “moody” when she dared defend herself.
What makes it even worse is that no one else in the class came to OP’s defense. The primarily male room said nothing, though another male student did call her a bad word that starts with the letter B for her efforts.
OP, like many other women and minorities attempting to compete in a white man’s world, is so tired of this behavior. She’s tired of feeling like her accomplishments don’t matter, like no matter what she does, people will see her as a woman first, like she has to work ten times harder to succeed than a man in her field.
The internet understood her frustrations.
Most users guessed that the male classmate was jealous and insecure about OP’s achievements, so he blamed it on gender to feel better about his own mediocrity.
If she’s getting interviews because she’s a woman, he doesn’t have to admit she’s better than he is.
Of course, this excuse highlights the misogyny rather than explaining it. This man is salty that a woman got the interview over him. He wouldn’t have a sexist excuse if it were a man. He’d probably acknowledge the man’s hard work and better grades. Men like this feel entitled to be better than women, even if they didn’t put in equal work.
To Say Something or Not?
Many users advised OP on the “right” response to bring him down a peg. But the truth is, nothing OP says will change his sexist point of view, and anything she says will likely give him the satisfaction of knowing he got to her.
Women must play a delicate game. They must have more achievements than men even to be considered for an interview, and even then, many will excuse it as their gender. If they fight back, they’re called “crazy.” If they ignore, they’re “B—.”
They can’t win, so there’s no sense in even playing.
Keep up the good work, OP, and anyone else in similar situations. Don’t let these jealous men bring you down, and don’t engage with their nonsense.