Success is the best revenge, or so they say.
If someone has scorned you, whether they be a lover, employer, or family member, the old adage is the best thing you can do to recover is not to hurt them back, as much as you may want to. Instead, it’s better to move on and live your best life.
Top 10 Reasons Why Success is the Best Revenge
Success really is the best revenge. Whether you are reeling from a breakup, job loss, rift with family, or broken friendship, pursuing your own version of success will help you feel better and prove that you didn’t need whatever those naysayers were offering – you’re good enough on your own.
Here’s why you should consider working on yourself and living well instead of pursuing whatever vengeance you had planned.
1. Success is Great!
A crucial reason success is the best revenge is the nature of success. Being successful is fantastic, whether you’re pursuing it for vengeance, justice, or another reason altogether.
Although our work culture often defines success in terms of money, it doesn’t have to be that way. Success can be whatever you want it to be. Some find success in raising well-adjusted children, while others find it in research. Whatever your definition of success, pursuing it is a noble goal, regardless of your motives.
2. You Won’t Get into Trouble
Let’s be honest for a moment. Some of our fantastical ideas of vengeance may toe the line against what’s legal. It may feel good to pour sugar into someone’s gas tank, but legally, that’s the destruction of property and not worth it.
What is legal, though, is living your life on your own terms. Following your passions and living a great life isn’t against the law. I’d argue that you have a moral imperative to live your best life while you’re here!
3. Success Helps You Move On
Even a small win can brighten your mood. If you’re mourning a relationship or job, it might be hard to let go of the hurt and anger while wallowing in it. However, when you put yourself out there and score even a small victory, you will start to feel better.
Consider how much those small accomplishments affect your mood and imagine that on a broad scale of a life well lived. Before long, you won’t even remember why you wanted revenge.
4. They Aren’t Worth it
When you plot revenge against something, you allow it to live rent-free in your mind. Whatever it is, it’s not worth it. Stop spending time and energy on something that’s not a part of your path.
Instead, spend that time and energy on your own personal goals and aspirations. You’ll be happier and healthier in the long run.
5. You’ll Be a Better Person
You’ve heard the other saying, “be the bigger person,” right? Well, the better person is the one who refuses to stoop to their level.
But it goes much further than this one instance. Rising above the drama and focusing on yourself will make you a better person. You’ll learn to ignore the haters, naysayers, and those who don’t support your goals. In addition, you’ll train yourself to look at the positives and maintain a growth mindset. While those who rejected you are rolling in the mud, you will be soaring.
6. They’ll Ponder What They Could Have Had
A great way to get revenge is to make those losers jealous! I don’t mean flaunting a new beau in front of the ex that cheated on you. Everyone in the room knows what’s going on when you do that.
Instead, make them jealous by living your best life. Take action in your own life and accomplish the goals you’ve been putting off. Show them (and yourself) what you are really made of.
When they inevitably come crawling back, apologizing, asking you to give them a second chance, you’ll have the immense satisfaction of saying “thanks but no thanks.”
7. Rejection Can Be Motivating
Not getting a promotion after working your butt off for it feels awful. It’s even worse when foul play, such as favoritism, is suspected. You may feel the urge to burn it all to the ground or to slack off because if your managers didn’t notice how excellent your work was, what’s even the point?
That’s the wrong attitude. Unless the company was doing something clearly illegal, the better path is to use rejection as a motivator. Ask your hiring manager what you can work on to be a better candidate in the future. Brush up on your skills, get certifications, and make yourself indispensable in your industry.
Then, job hop. Move on to greener pastures that value your contributions.
8. The Victory Will Be Oh So Sweet
Think back to a time when you defeated a hard boss on your favorite video game, won a sport after hours of training or aced a difficult test after hundreds of study sessions. Do you recall how desperately you wanted that success, how much time and effort you put into it, and finally, after blood, sweat, and tears, the immense satisfaction you felt upon achieving it?
Now imagine how sweet the victory of living a successful life will feel after they all said you weren’t good enough. You can almost taste it, can’t you? That feeling of accomplishment when you achieve everything you ever dreamed of will feel so much better after the hard work you put into it.
9. Something to Prove to Me
The harsh truth is that sometimes we seek vengeance as a shield for our egos. We know the better person got the job, the relationship wasn’t right for us, and the friendship wasn’t working out. Those harsh truths don’t make rejection hurt any less.
Although revenge is never the answer, it’s doubly wrong in these instances. Instead of seeking vengeance, prove to yourself that you can do it, that you are worth it, and that you deserve better. The best way to accomplish this is by achieving success in whatever way is most important to you.
10. Success Speaks for Itself (and for You!)
One of the best things about success is that you don’t have to show it off. You don’t have to gloat or rub it in their face. When you’re successful, the world will notice.
Success is the best revenge because it speaks for you. You don’t have to gloat or rub anything in anyone’s face. They’ll see it for themselves, and then you will get to live rent-free in their head rather than the other way around.
Bonus: Vengeance Isn’t Actually a Good Thing
Revenge may feel good at the moment, but it’s fleeting. And more likely than not, you will end up feeling worse or seeing unintended consequences.
The iconic show Buffy the Vampire Slayer illustrates the ill-advised quest for revenge with Vengeance Demons. These evil creatures seek out hurt people and manipulate them into wishing for revenge. Unfortunately, the wish is usually taken to the extreme, causing far more pain and suffering for everyone involved.
Although this example showcases the extreme effects of revenge, it’s not wrong. Seeking vengeance isn’t a good thing, regardless of how good it might feel in the moment.
Success is the Best Revenge
Success is the best revenge. If you really want revenge, become successful.
You could take no other action that would be as satisfying in the long run as living a happy, fulfilling life. It’s within your reach, so go after it!
Melanie launched Partners in Fire in 2017 to document her quest for financial independence with a mix of finance, fun, and solving the world’s problems. She’s self educated in personal finance and passionate about fighting systematic problems that prevent others from achieving their own financial goals. She also loves travel, anthropology, gaming and her cats.