10 Shocking Ways People Sabotage Great Friendships

Best friends are magical. They see the best in us, offer us a helping hand when needed, and are always up to join us on our fantastic adventures. 

However, even some of the best friendships end in heartbreak. People we believe to be friends sometimes showcase their true colors when times get hard, and occasionally friendships end for the silliest reasons. 

While enjoying my favorite community on Reddit, r/askreddit, I found a thread asking users to share their stories of lost friendships.

“What ended your friendship with a former best friend?” asked the original poster (OP). 

The answers showcase the fallible nature of humanity and make us thankful we weren’t friends with some of these selfish folks. 

Delivering Bad News

Sad woman on a couch looking unsure of herself
Photo Credit: Olha Nosova via Shutterstock.com.

One user said their best friend no longer speaks to them because they were the bearer of bad news. 

“His wife cheated on him. I was the bad guy for trying to let him know,” the user shared. 

Others added that this situation is far too common. The affected party may not believe their friend, breaking the trust factor essential to any relationship. In other scenarios, the couple will work it out, but the friend who told will be labeled as a meddler and get cut off. 

Also See: Are You an Empath?

Begging for Money

Confused woman holding a wad of cash money.
Photo Credit: pathdoc via Shutterstock.com.

Another user ditched a close friend after their weird behavior regarding money. They shared that their friend asked to borrow 3K, no questions asked. 

Most people would lift an eyebrow at such a request, and the user did the same, refusing to give the money unless they knew what it was for. The friend didn’t want to say but kept badgering them about when the money was coming. 

“Turns out they got scammed, but that ended our friendship really quickly,” stated the Redditor. 

Choosing a Toxic Relationship

man yelling at his girlfriend
Photo Credit: Ollyy via Shutterstock.com.

Maintaining close friendships through the ups and downs of typical dating and settling into a long-term partnership can be challenging, but most of us navigate it. 

However, sometimes a close friend will ditch everyone they care about for a new relationship. People choose toxic partners over their friends again and again. It’s a tale as old as time. 

“My former best friend also chose men, especially toxic men, over her friends and family’s relationships,” shared one Redditor. 

“Mine chose a guy also,” added another.  “I was in a relationship and still managed to have my own interests and activities. We could have had a plan for days to weeks, but if he was free – plan suddenly canceled, often last minute.”

People struggle to juggle a new relationship with existing friendships and often fail. However, friends shouldn’t be so harsh in judging. Remember that your friend may have fallen into an abusive relationship, and keep the lines of communication open in case they need help escaping. 

Popular: Financial Abuse is Real. Know the Signs


Woman facing a man happily talking, he is facing away from her with his hand up blocking her looking at his phone.
Photo Credit: pathdoc via Shutterstock.com.

Ghosting is supposed to be for one-time dates that didn’t go well, but some folks ghost people they’ve known forever. 

One user shared that their former best friend stopped talking to them one day. “Didn’t respond to calls or texts, wasn’t home when I showed up, nothing,” they said. 

Getting ghosted by a date is one thing, but getting ghosted by someone you’ve known and trusted is a special kind of heartbreak. 

Their Bad Children

Angry child screaming.
Photo Credit: Ollyy via Shutterstock.com.

Long-time friends often share life experiences. They watch either get married and care for each other’s children. 

Unfortunately, these new phases of life can bring out the worst in some people. One user shared that a great friendship ended after a vacation with each other’s kids turned awful. 

“Her son was so disrespectful, swearing, nasty attitude, and so mean to my daughter the entire trip,” they explained. They continued, saying the little boy ripped a cereal box away from their younger daughter and slapped her when she cried. 

“I tried disciplining him, and my friend blew up at me and proceeded to DEFEND her son, as she called my daughter a “whiny baby,” they said, sharing that they immediately left and never spoke to the friend again. 

Read Next: To Have Or Not: The Case for Opting Out of Parenthood

1000 Little Cuts

Man sitting with his hands near his chin, sadly thinking and seriously thinking
Photo Credit: spixel via Shutterstock.com.

Often, it’s not just one thing that ends a friendship. It’s thousands of little things that, when added up, make us realize the person is not worth our time. 

One user shared that a former friend often cut them out of activities or refused to do anything unless they got something in return. 

After time, we wonder if the person really wants to be our friend or only hangs out with us out of convenience. 


three mean people, a woman in front and two men behind her.
Photo Credit: pathdoc via Shutterstock.com.

Some people never learned to play nice. They constantly put their friends down over their own insecurities, and eventually, the friends don’t want to take it anymore. 

“I realized that all that “good-natured ribbing” over time was really more malicious than good-natured and that I was the outlet for his own insecurities,” shared one user. 

“So much this. The ribbing was flat-out bullying, and I took it for too long,” replied another. 

Friends should support each other and bring each other up. If a so-called friend is constantly mean, rude, or belittling, it’s okay to distance yourself. 

Popular: Don’t Engage in These Red-Flag Hobbies if You Want Friends


Man shrugging as if to say "oh well"
Photo Credit: Cast Of Thousands via Shutterstock.com.

You can’t be friends with folks who don’t show up. One Redditor said they ended a friendship because the person would constantly flake on plans without a word. 

“He kept not showing up when we said we’d meet somewhere. No call, no text, nothing,” they said. 

“My wife had a friend like that. Eventually, she (my wife) just started saying yes whenever the friend suggested getting together, knowing nothing would come of it,” added another. 

Many of us simply stop inviting folks like this, and the friendship fades. 

Destroying Stuff and Lying About It

Woman crossing her arms frowning.
Photo Credit: Krakenimages.com via Shutterstock.com.

Too many Redditors shared stories of so-called friends destroying their things and lying about them. One said a friend got a DUI while borrowing their car and proceeded to lie, while another said their friend broke into their home and destroyed it, only coming clean a year later. 

These types of folks aren’t friends. They’re users; the sooner you realize that and cut them out of your life, the better. 

See Next: 37 Tips for Living Your Best Life

Wrong Gendered Best Friends

Man and woman embracing, kissing each other's cheeks in greeting.
Photo Credit: BearFotos via Shutterstock.com.

Numerous Redditors expressed sadness at friendships that ended due to new relationships. The common theme was a male-female friendship and a jealous new partner. 

This dynamic is difficult to navigate for many reasons. Sometimes the friendship really is too close, and the two behave like romantic partners more than friends. Other times, the new partner has insecurities and can’t handle such a close friendship. 

Either way, it’s hurtful to the neglected friend, but there are things you can do to mitigate it. All too often, the “friend” expects things to be the same when in reality, all friendships change when partnerships develop. The friend needs to step back, respect the relationship, and ensure their friend always puts the partner first. 

Friendships End for Many Reasons

woman shrugging with a confused look on her face on a pink background.
Photo Credit: Dean Drobot via Shutterstock.com.

The Reddit thread showcases stories of theft, infidelity, and other inappropriate behavior. With friends who behave this way, who needs enemies?

Be happy your friends aren’t as awful as the folks these Redditors dealt with, and if they are, remember that it’s okay to end the friendship.

More from Partners in Fire – Ditch the Life Script

happy carefree woman in a field
Photo Credit: Maria Markevich via Shutterstock.com.

You don’t have to get married and have kids to be happy. The life script isn’t for everyone. Here’s why you should ditch it and do your own thing

More from Partners in Fire – She Can Afford the Bills on Her Own, Yet Doesn’t Want her Husband to Quit His Job

woman crossing arms like she won't do it again
Photo Credit: Khosro via Shutterstock.com.

He wants to stop working, she doesn’t think that would be fair. What do you think

More from Partners in Fire – Enjoy Your Friendships While You Have Them

group of happy people at a restaurant
Photo Credit: djile via Shutterstock.com.

Sometimes friendships end because we don’t nurture them. Avoid that by doing new and interesting things with your posse!

Here are 101 fun things to do with your friends

More from Partners in Fire – Let It Go

close up of smiling happy older woman
Photo Credit: mimagephotography via Shutterstock.com.

Some things aren’t worth the effort, though unfortunately, sometimes we only learn that as we grow older. 

Here are the top things people learn to let go of as they age

More from Partners in Fire – Entitled Millenial Throws Fit When Roomate Moves Out

Spoiled woman wearing nice clothes whining and crying.
Photo Credit: Mix and Match Studio via Shutterstock.com.

It’s hard to find a great friend who’s also a great roomate. One young lady has the best of both worlds, but gets upset when her roommate is ready to move on. 

Read about it here!