Buying a first home can be stressful, but it’s even more so when our partner throws out ridiculous demands.
One woman came to Reddit wondering if she was wrong after she refused to put her boyfriend’s name on the title of her new home.
Buying a First House
The Original Poster (OP) just finished residency and started her first real job on a doctor’s salary.
Ecstatic, she decided to buy a new house, which she planned to live in with her boyfriend of two years.
But of Course, He’s Unemployed
Her boyfriend is between jobs and can’t contribute to the mortgage. OP decided to use a Doctor’s loan, a unique product available only to doctors which offers lower interest rates, for the purchase.
The limitation is that the loan must be in her name alone because the boyfriend has no income (and he’s not a doctor.)
He Wants To Be on the Title
OP’s boyfriend is helping with the purchase. She said he got a nice severance check from his last job and will contribute to the closing costs with that money, to the tune of $22,000.
Because of his hefty contribution to the closing costs, OP’s boyfriend wants his name on the title. OP is uncomfortable with this arrangement.
She says she’d be happy to refinance in both of their names when he got on his feet or to draft up an agreement before closing, which would protect them both in case of a split, but he wouldn’t agree to those options, and now it’s too late for the agreement.
Who’s in the Wrong?
OP came to Reddit, wondering if she was wrong. Should his name be on the title, or was he unreasonable to even ask?
They plan on getting married someday, but this argument has her rethinking that.
Don’t Put Someone Else on the Title
Reddit agreed that putting someone’s name on the title who wasn’t financially liable for the mortgage was a bad idea.
“OP, I have a law degree. Do not, do not, DO NOT let him on the title until you’re married,” stressed one user.
“This is a hill to die on,” said another. “If he can’t contribute, he doesn’t get to be on the [title].”
Don’t Take the Money
The boyfriend’s contribution to closing costs remains a major sticking point. 22K is a massive amount of money, so users understand why he wants to protect himself with equity.
However, having someone on the title who won’t contribute to the mortgage is a terrible idea, so Reddit advised OP against taking the money.
“Do not do not DO NOT take his $22,000,” stated one user.
“I see his perspective,” said another. “He’s giving up 22k with no guarantee he’ll have a claim on the asset. Is it possible to buy without his assistance?” they asked.
More to the Story
The OP may have left crucial details out of the story. Someone claiming to be the boyfriend commented, providing far more context to their relationship and his demand for his name on the title.
Those comments mysteriously disappeared, but not before one Reddit user found and summarized them.
“He already put up $5,000 towards the close, previously subsidized her lifestyle for years while she was in school, and she paid nothing, moved cities to be with her, asked her not to buy a house until he had a new job, her own parents told her she was over her head with the house, and she unilaterally went ahead anyway – but didn’t have the cash for the earnest money so he provided it,” they said.
Although we still don’t recommend putting someone else’s name on the title, this new perspective clarifies the boyfriend’s stance. He’s contributed a ton of money during their relationship and wants to protect himself.
Overall, it sounds like this relationship won’t work. What’s his is hers, and what’s hers is also hers. They must work out their financial differences before they tie themselves to a mortgage and marriage.
Source: Reddit