Bringing a new life into the world is stressful. Kids are expensive, and the nine months of pregnancy can wreak havoc on women’s bodies and minds.
One man came to Reddit because he’s already fed up before the child is even born.
She Needs To Stop Complaining
The Original Poster (OP) sought Reddit’s advice because his wife became distant after an argument, where he basically told her to stop complaining.
“My wife has been complaining every single day,” lamented OP. “She’s having a difficult pregnancy, so she has my sympathies, but I can’t sleep at night because she wants to have these talks or go on a drive because she’s stressed.”
OP Stressed Out
OP said he’s the one who’s stressed out because he’s been working longer hours to save up money for the baby.
His wife’s constant complaining about growing their child is cramping his style.
“I’m a pretty cheerful person normally, and I absolutely hate hearing people complain constantly because it really brings me down,” he said.
He Tells Wife To Shut It
He finally had enough and told his wife he no longer wants to hear it.
“I told her that I’m balancing a job and taking care of you, plus everyone in life has their own challenges and you can’t just whine about it and play the pity olympics, it’s getting old,” he admitted.
And So She Stopped Talking To Him
After about a week, the wife was still distant, shocking OP enough that he came to Reddit to share his woes.
“Now I’m frustrated because I miss my wife,” he said, adding that he only wanted her to talk on his terms. “I just didn’t want her to keep complaining, but I never asked her to stop talking to me. All I asked was that she be a little more positive.”
Is OP Wrong?
OP came to the popular subreddit where people can get unbiased views of whether they’re wrong because he now feels bad that his wife is distant. Was he wrong to tell her to shut up about her pregnancy woes?
Yes OP – You’re a Jerk
Reddit’s consensus is yes; OP was a massive jerk.
“OP, you’re being extremely self-centered,” responded one user. “This is the easy part right now, you really should seek out therapy to help you cope.”
“No one likes negativity, but it’s life, it happens. And honestly, the moment someone uses the ‘someone has it worse than you’ phrase, they become an AH to me, because it serves no purpose other than to tell that person that they’re not allowed to be upset,” added another.
Lack of Empathy for Wife
OP clearly has no empathy for his wife, who is likely in the third trimester, based on his post. Everything is about how he is suffering while she’s growing an entire human being in what OP even admits is a difficult pregnancy.
“Pregnancy is the worst, I hated it,” began one user. “OP needs to grow the bell up and realise he’s a giant AH, and he needs to be supporting his wife and making her life as easy as possible for her because it’s not going to get any easier for her.”
“That whole thing of pregnant women remember who they’re treated is very true,” added another. “It’s one of the most uncomfortable, painful, sometimes downright gross, emotional, vulnerable times any human can go through. I know that comment had to be heartbreaking and caused her entire view point of him to shift.”
If You Can’t Handle Pregnancy, You Can’t Handle a Kid
Many pointed out that OP is not ready for parenthood. The stresses of pregnancy are only the tip of the iceberg, and things will get much worse with a newborn.
“Honestly, you should never have made a kid if your morale was so easy to drain. This is only the pregnancy, and you are not even the one building the baby. I can’t imagine how it’s going to be once the baby is there,” said one user.
Kids are hard, pregnancy is tough on women, and life, in general, isn’t always roses and butterflies. OP needs to learn how to handle the negative because his toxic positivity brings everyone else down.