Divorce is never easy, but sometimes people make it much harder on themselves. One man came to Reddit seeking validation but told on himself so drastically that the entire internet turned against him.
Grand Scheme Costs Ex-Wife
The Original Poster (OP) started with the backstory. While going through a divorce, he devised a brilliant plan to prevent them from selling the family home.
He’d take out a loan against the equity to pay for a new place, allowing his ex-wife to remain in the home and ensuring it would be part of their kids’ inheritance someday.
His ex didn’t seem keen on the idea, but he eventually got his way.
“She was reluctant, but eventually I convinced her,” said the OP, adding the little jab, “She’s always been like that, her reluctance to take any chances has held me back many times.”
As everyone predicted, OP ran into financial troubles and couldn’t keep up with all the bills.
“I kept paying the bank,” he insisted but added that his idea of “payment” won’t cut it for a bank. He didn’t pay every month and often paid less than the full amount due.
The bank eventually tired of his games and foreclosed on the house.
Ex-Wife Nearly Homeless
OP’s antics caused his ex-wife to lose her home. The loan was taken out against the equity of her house; thus, she was forced to move out during foreclosure.
Luckily, their youngest son had room and allowed her to live with him rather than go homeless.
OP Stil Has His House
OP bought a house with the home equity line of credit, and somehow he could keep up the bills enough to keep his own place.
However, he downplays his housing situation.
“I lost a lot too, and even though I have the house that I bought back then, it’s nothing fancy, and it’s expensive to maintain,” complains OP.
Why Don’t My Kids Help Me?
That brings us to the crux of OP’s complaints. His kids help their mother, but they refuse to help him.
“They all go out of their way to help their mom, while I only get scraps every now and then, even though I also needed help sometimes since then,” whines OP.
He demanded that they show him more gratitude (which we can only assume means money) because he helped raise them.
The kids laughed in his face, calling him a jerk and saying if anything, he owed their mom money after what he did.
Oblivious OP admits that he pays more than her but insists he can’t do anything because “I have expenses too.”
He came to Reddit wondering if he was a jerk for expecting his kids to give him money.
OP Has Zero Self Awareness
Reddit users couldn’t help but laugh at OP’s lack of self-awareness. He claims his ex-wife’s reluctance constantly held him back, yet admitted she was right in not trusting his instincts.
“Sounds like her reluctance to take chances has only held you back from bankruptcy,” said one user.
He Destroyed Ex Wife’s Life
OP’s master plan completely destroyed his ex-wife’s life. She lost her home, and he has the gall to say it’s no big deal because their son offered her a place to stay.
“You bullied your ex wife into putting her house up for collateral – which I guarantee she did just to get you away from her – and then your poor planning meant that her house was stolen from her. You lost nothing, and she lost everything,” said one user, clarifying exactly what happened in the situation.
Kids Don’t Owe You Anything
OP’s sense of entitlement to his kid’s money is astounding. Then the entire post drips with resentment over the fact that his kids won’t give him money.
“Your children are under no obligation to help you, and whereas their reasoning for helping or not helping is not anyone’s business but their own, you may want to examine why this is the case,” said one user.
“Wait, you’re mad the kids won’t support you while they’re busy supporting their mom, the woman you literally screwed out of a home?” asked another incredulous user.
OP Needs Some Self Reflection
OP needs to take a moment to sit with himself and his financial decisions. There’s a reason why his kids refuse to talk to him and won’t help him, and it’s all his own fault. He destroyed their mom’s life and acts like a spoiled brat, thinking he deserves their financial assistance.
We hope his ex can rebuild her life and hope he learns to value other people.
Melanie launched Partners in Fire in 2017 to document her quest for financial independence with a mix of finance, fun, and solving the world’s problems. She’s self educated in personal finance and passionate about fighting systematic problems that prevent others from achieving their own financial goals. She also loves travel, anthropology, gaming and her cats.