Have you ever been to a restaurant with someone who insists on getting the perfect shot of their entree for Instagram before eating?
One woman fits the bill and came to Reddit to find out if she was in the wrong after her desire to take food pics for the gram caused a rift with her boyfriend.
She Enjoys Taking Food Pictures
The Original Poster (OP) said she enjoys taking pictures at restaurants for Instagram. However, she insisted she doesn’t make a big deal out of it.
“I don’t turn meals into a whole photoshoot production when I go out, but I like to snap a few photos of everything as it comes out,” she said, adding that she has about 1000 Instagram followers and enjoys the food pictures as a hobby.
Boyfriend Hates it, So She Makes Other Arrangements
Her boyfriend can’t stand the hobby and makes sure she can’t enjoy it when they’re together.
“My boyfriend HATES it and will go out of his way to take a big bite of food or mess up his plate with his fork before I can snap any pics, and he rolls his eyes when I take pics of my own food, so I pretty much stopped bothering when we went out together,” she explained, adding that she found a group of food bloggers in her area. They all go out and share the food-photo experiences.
Tight Funds Limit Opportunities
Unfortunately, the OP faced tough financial times and could not participate with her blogger girlfriends.
“Money has been tight lately because of some medical bills, so I haven’t been able to go out to eat with my foodie girls, and the infrequent date with my boyfriend is the only chance I get to eat out.”
Boyfriend Reluctantly Agrees
She didn’t want to give up her hobby, so she tried to explain how important it was to her boyfriend.
“I had to sit him down and have a “Look, just let me enjoy things” conversation with him and told him I was gonna take pics of my own food when we went out and could he please just not be immature about it,” she said. In addition, she wanted to compromise on taking photos of the appetizer and his meal, asking if she could have 30 seconds to do so on nights she paid for dinner.
“I got a sort of half-hearted “do whatever you want” confirmation,” she stated.
But Then He Goes Out of His Way To Ruin It
Though he reluctantly agreed during the conversation, he had no intention of being reasonable at dinner.
When it was her turn to pay, he let her take a photo of the appetizer but flipped out when the main courses came.
“I went to snap a pic of his, and he messed it up with his fork. Then he reached over and stirred up MY pasta to also ruin the photo of my own meal!” she exclaimed.
OP Refuses to Pay
Upset about the ruined photo opportunities, OP told her boyfriend she wouldn’t pay for his meal, despite their original agreement that she would.
He flipped out.
“He said he wouldn’t have ordered a cocktail if he knew that I was gonna skip my turn. He says I owe him one because I don’t get to just decide not to pay according to our agreement after we’ve already ordered,” said OP.
Should OP Have Paid?
She came to Reddit to find out if she was wrong. Should she have paid for dinner despite the ruined photos because it was, after all, her turn? Or was she justified in being upset because he intentionally destroyed her photo opportunities?
Many Agree with OP
The top comments all agreed with OP. Many pointed out that 30 seconds wasn’t too long and that the compromise that she’d only do it when she paid for the meal was fair.
Many pointed to the boyfriend’s comment about the cocktail as a sign of a deeper issue.
“Also, the fact that he said “I wouldn’t have gotten a cocktail if I had to spend my own money” – like, if she’s got medical bills, maybe don’t waste HER money either. I hope she dumps him,” said one user.
“That part bothered me so much!” exclaimed another. “If someone else is paying is when you don’t get the cocktail. What an entitled jerk.”
Let People Enjoy Their Hobbies
Others couldn’t understand why OP’s boyfriend couldn’t let her enjoy things.
“I don’t get people who go out of their way to actively ruin other people’s fun. He totally could’ve just started to eat HIS food. But to mess with yours is just not acceptable,” said one user.
“He had to actively ruin her fun and enjoyment for no reason other to be mean,” added another.
A Few Think OP is Wrong
You’ll get a few different takes if you sort the thread by controversial. Some called OP the jerk for forcing her hobbies on her boyfriend, while others said they were wrong.
“You absolutely do not get to tell other people to wait to eat their food so you can indulge your social media addiction,” said one. “He went too far in messing with your own food, but frankly, I don’t blame him for being fed up.”
“I wouldn’t let someone photograph my food,” said another.” I’m there to spend time with them, not to let them divulge in their hobby, which encroaches on our enjoyment of the evening.”
What Do You Think?
Most Reddit users said there was no reason her boyfriend couldn’t indulge in her harmless hobby for a few seconds, and he was absolutely in the wrong for ruining her food.
Do you agree with them?
Would you have still paid if you were in OP’s place?
Melanie launched Partners in Fire in 2017 to document her quest for financial independence with a mix of finance, fun, and solving the world’s problems. She’s self educated in personal finance and passionate about fighting systematic problems that prevent others from achieving their own financial goals. She also loves travel, anthropology, gaming and her cats.