Most women want to date men who see them as equal partners, even human beings. Far too many men don’t. They think of women as tools that cook, clean, and care for them. The misogyny is so engrained in culture that many can’t see it for what it is.
One man couldn’t fathom that his girlfriend had knowledge and experience with misogyny and came to Reddit to validate his actions after she left him.
It Starts with a Book
The Original Poster (OP) said his girlfriend was upset with him for buying a book.
But it wasn’t just any book. The book was by self-proclaimed misogynist Jordan Peterson, who OP reveals he’s been listening to.
Understandably upset that her boyfriend would listen to and support a person with such problematic views on women, OP’s girlfriend retreated to her mother’s house, telling OP she’ll return if he gets rid of the book.
OP’s Hero
It’s not just the book, though. OP admitted that he idolizes football star Cristiano Ronaldo, who was accused of sexual assault. Although the case was thrown out on a technicality, Ronaldo admitted that the accuser said no multiple times and that he even apologized after the attack.
He Refuses to Listen to Girlfriend
OP said he started listening to Peterson because Ronaldo does and only recently started engaging with the influencer.
His girlfriend tried to explain why Peterson was problematic. Still, OP refused to listen, despite not knowing much about Peterson, using those iconic words men use to dismiss women’s valid concerns “Calm down.”
OP Must Be Right, Right?
OP came to Reddit, seeking relationship advice to validate his actions.
“She is the one being unreasonable, right?” he asks, unable to comprehend that his girlfriend doesn’t want to date someone who, at the very least, supports those with abhorrent views on women.
No, OP, You’re Not Right
The folks in the relationship advice subreddit tried to explain to OP exactly why he was wrong.
“JP would be a deal breaker for a lot of women,” said one user.
“Throw away the book is the best advice. Don’t go down the extremist rabbit hole,” advised another.
“This would be a relationship ender for me,” added a third. “In fact, I judge men based in their tolerance for JP. It tells you everything you need to know about them.”
Listen to Your Girlfriend
Others pointed out that OP’s misogyny was showing when he immediately dismissed his girlfriend’s concerns to defend a man he knew very little about.
“You basically told your girlfriend you don’t value her knowledge or opinion,” explained one user.
“She TOLD him what Jordan Peterson was like, he had no clue, had no facts, and then TOLD HER SHE WAS WRONG,” exclaimed another.
OP Has a Choice
Some users didn’t outright say OP was wrong, but they did inform him that he had a choice. His girlfriend is free to set any boundary she wants and end the relationship for any reason. She’s already decided – the book is a deal breaker. She doesn’t want to date someone who supports JP.
The next choice is up to him. Which is more important, the book or his girlfriend?
If he chooses the book, he must understand that many women share his girlfriend’s views.
Men Have a Choice
OP’s dilemma highlights a growing battle between men and women. As more and more men engage with misogynistic influences like Peterson and his ilk, they’re becoming less and less attractive to women.
Yet men refuse to give up the influencers, instead blaming women for all their woes. Some even go so far as to lie about their political beliefs, knowing how unattractive misogyny is to the women they want to date.
Men have a choice. They can stop taking the easy road, which lets them blame women for everything wrong in their lives, and start stepping up to the challenges of modern society. Women want to date men, but they want to date someone who respects their autonomy and sees them as a human being. Men get to choose whether they will meet that challenge.