As children, we’re taught that anything is possible. If we work hard, we can accomplish anything. People will like us for us. We’re unique and special.
When we grow up, we learn the harsh truth. Most of these wonderful platitudes aren’t true at all. If we want to be happy and successful, we must accept the world for what it is, not what we want it to be.
We must accept life’s harshest truths.
Harsh Truths About Life
Are you ready to grow up and accept the reality of life? Here, we’ve uncovered 21 bitter pills about life everybody learns, one way or another.
Learn them the easy way here, before life bites you when you least expect it.
You Can’t Help Everyone
Have you ever watched someone spiral deeper and deeper into addiction? They refuse treatment, and despite your best efforts to pull them out, they fall further.
Far too many of us spend precious time and energy trying to help someone who doesn’t want our help. We feel for them, we know that they could get better if they tried, and we want to be that catalyst that forces them to improve.
It’s a lost cause. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want it. Let go, and free yourself of any guilt resulting from the consequences of their actions.
You’re Annoying
Parents love their children and protect their egos from suffering. Sometimes, they do us a disservice by allowing us to behave horribly.
When we’re adults, we need to accept the truth. We’re annoying, and people don’t like our behavior. Once we accept that, we can work to change ourselves.
Family Means Nothing
We all have an idealized notion of family as people who love and support you no matter what.
Unfortunately, many of us realize early on in life that’s not true. When you come from a toxic family, blood is meaningless.
People don’t have your best interests at heart because “they’re family.” A harsh truth about life is that many people’s families are filled with horrible, selfish people who would rather see you fail than offer a modicum of support.
Family only means something if your family truly loves and supports each other. Stop trying to get people to care because they’re related to you.
Life’s Not Fair
The harshest truth about the universe is that it isn’t fair. There’s no just world. The world doesn’t reward the good and punish the bad. It doesn’t care one way or another. It just is.
Bad things happen to good people, while cheaters reap rewards and go unpunished. The world keeps spinning.
Stop trying to make sense of a senseless world, and do your best to promote good in the small ways you can.
What Makes You Happy
Far too many people follow the script and never consider what would make them truly happy. They do what their parents and society expect: go to school, get a job, find a partner, have kids, and then wonder why they’re miserable after they did everything right.
The bitter truth is that society wants conformity. It pushes us into these boxes because that’s good for profits but not always suitable for the individual. Paving your way is terrifying, but it’s usually worth it.
Friendships Aren’t Forever
Friendships are glorious, but they, much like anything, often have an expiration date. Cherish your friendships during each phase of your life, and learn to let them go when they no longer work for you.
Nourish the friendships you wish to maintain. People won’t stick around if you never put in any effort.
People Don’t Care
We’re the center of our own universe. The vast majority of people will only care about you if they get something from you. Once they have what they need, they’ll drop you.
This harsh truth is liberating once accepted, though. When you realize people don’t care, you can live your life on your own terms and stop worrying about what they think. More than likely, they aren’t thinking much about you at all.
Most Relationships Fail
We typically enter relationships hoping they will last. However, most of them won’t. Most of us will have numerous relationships before finding lasting love.
Though you may part, you should cherish the time you spent with someone. Appreciate the lessons learned and the precious memories. But when the time comes, let go and move on with your life.
Even True Love Won’t Last
We can’t know great joy without great sorrow. Even the best relationship will eventually end, and when it does, it will leave one partner devastated.
At best, you’ll have forty happy years of bliss before one of you leaves this plane. Enjoy the moments you have together, you never know when they will be the last.
You Can Do Everything Right
You can do everything right and still lose. As Captain Picard of the USS Enterprise famously said, “It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life.”
It’s true. You win some, you lose some, and there’s nothing you can do to change that.
Sometimes, it is Your Fault
Despite Captain Picard’s wise words, a harsh truth remains: sometimes, it is your fault.
Our egos try to protect us, developing narratives to blame everyone else for our problems, but we need to acknowledge the truth when we can. You’re in control of your destiny, and sometimes, your actions led you to the negative space you find yourself in.
Admitting to yourself that your problems are self-inflicted is one of the first steps to overcoming them and digging out.
Hard Work Doesn’t Equal Success
Some of the hardest-working people in the world are also the poorest. The idea that working hard leads to success is capitalistic propaganda designed to make the working class blame themselves for their financial woes.
In truth, it takes luck, skill, status, and networking to succeed. Those born into successful families are far more likely to succeed than those born into poverty.
Some Things Can’t Be Taken Back
Our actions have consequences, and sometimes, those consequences last forever.
Whether it be words said in a fit of rage or a careless action in a moment of stupidity, sometimes our choices haunt us for the rest of our lives.
As much as we want to take some things back, we don’t always have the opportunity. If you accept this harsh truth early in life, you can be more mindful of your actions and words to avoid mistakes with lasting consequences.
No One is Obligated to Care
You can’t force people to care about you. We can put in 100% of the effort and do everything right, yet some people may still decide they don’t want to be around us.
The harsh truth relates to everyone, from family to so-called friends, coworkers to potential romantic partners.
Once you realize nobody has to care, you start to appreciate those who do so much more.
The Bad Guys Win
In an Iconic episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the wise Watcher Giles lies to Buffy about the nature of the world. “It’s terribly simple,” he says. “The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and, uh, we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after.”
Buffy’s simple response, “liar,” tells it all. They both knew it was a lie, as do we. Sometimes, the bad guys win. The sociopath who stole your work gets promoted over you. The jerk ends up with the love of your life. The worst person possible becomes the richest man in the world.
The world doesn’t care about the good guys or the bad guys. Defeating them is up to us.
Life Takes Work
Some people expect all the good things about life to be handed to them on a silver platter. The world doesn’t work that way.
If you want a great life, you must make it happen for yourself. Nobody will hand you a house, a job, or a lifetime of epic experiences, you must go out and get those things.
And it often takes effort. You have to go to college or trade school, learn a skill, earn money, network, research, and do all the things necessary to survive and thrive – mostly on your own.
The Best Laid Plans…
Planning is essential. It helps us map out the actions we need to take to achieve our goals.
However, even the best plans can fail. We have to adapt.
It’s a blessing as much as it is a harsh truth. Stop worrying so much about your plan. Work towards it, of course, but also allow yourself to enjoy life. Open yourself up to new and different possibilities. Sometimes, a change of plan is for the better.
Everyone Ages
Taking care of your body is vital for a long, healthy life. But the truth is, despite how much we work out, eat well, and care for our bodies, we will eventually succumb to old age.
Staying healthy will delay the inevitable, allowing you more precious time to enjoy your life, but nobody lives forever.
Make the most of the time you have.
Bad Things Happen to Good People
Life isn’t unfair, but it doesn’t care. Sometimes, bad things happen to the best people.
The dedicated worker may lose their job. You may experience a car accident or natural disaster. Life comes for us all.
The message here isn’t to stop being good. It’s to understand that life doesn’t play favorites and ensure you have a safety net in place to handle anything it will throw your way.
Kids Get Sick
One of the harshest truths about life is that sometimes, the most innocent among us develop severe health conditions.
Children get sick. They have chronic health conditions like cancer or genetic syndromes that will never get better. Coping with the reality that your child is sick and may never recover is one of the worst bitter pills in life.
Time Flies So Quickly
We’re often so busy that we don’t even notice the days and years slip away. One day, we’re old, and life has passed us by.
It’s a harsh truth about life that the old know all too well, but it always somehow gets lost on the young.
It doesn’t have to be that way. Here’s How To Savor Every Moment