Our social contract is simple. Responsibility for feeding and sheltering children falls to the parents. If they can’t afford it, they should seek government assistance.
One woman thought everyone around her should prioritize the children she chose to have and got a rude awakening upon discovering that’s not the case.
Friends and Coworkers
We often make friends with our colleagues. We spend eight hours a day with them, so it’s best to be on friendly terms. However, some people take work friendships too far.
One woman came to Reddit after her “work friend,” Angela, threw a fit about borrowing money.
The Original Poster (OP) said she was casual friends with Angela while they worked on the same team. They shared a few interests but didn’t really engage after work and didn’t talk much after OP received a promotion.
OP is 25 with no kids, while Angela is 27, married, and has three children.
A One Time Emergency
Angela often complained about money. She worked while her husband stayed home with the kids, and they were on a tight budget.
One day, she asked OP to lend her some money, as the kids all came down with food poisoning and they needed medical attention.
Understanding the seriousness of the situation, OP gladly paid up, and Angela repaid her within the agreed-upon timeline.
OP thought that was the end of it.
Angela seemed to think OP’s one-time loan meant she’d always lend money. A few weeks after the medical emergency, she hounded OP for cash again, claiming she couldn’t pay the rent.
OP Says No
OP understands a one-time emergency but felt this second ask was too much. She declined, saying she couldn’t afford to offer more money.
Break Room Banter
Later that day, OP was having lunch with another colleague and discussing after-work plans. OP mentioned a concert she was getting tickets for.
Unfortunately, the needy netty overheard this conversation and flipped out over OP’s spending.
“Angela heard our conversation as she’s on the same table, she said, “You actually have money to spare,” reported OP, confused at the interjection. When she asked Angela what she was talking about, the older woman scolded her for daring to spend her own money on her own enjoyment while Angela’s kids went hungry.
“She answered, “You said you don’t have extra money to let me borrow so my family can keep our place and be able to eat,” and also attempted to guilt OP by adding that she likes concerts too but would never prioritize one over feeding and sheltering children.
Not My Kids To Feed
OP had enough of Angela’s entitled attitude. She lashed out, saying Angela chose to have three kids, and they’re not OP’s responsibility.
The pair exchanged words, with Angela calling OP insensitive and OP insisting that the kids aren’t her responsibility.
Was OP Wrong?
Since the argument took place in a work lunch room, numerous other employees overheard. Some said OP was too harsh with Angela, but her mother supported her.
She came to Reddit wondering if she should apologize.
You Don’t Owe Her Anything
Reddit agreed with OP and her mother, saying the coworker’s behavior was way out of line and OP doesn’t owe her anything.
“How entitled of her. Of course you can choose to go to a concert over spending your money on feeding her kids,” said one.
“Why the hell would anyone ever think they’re entitled to their random coworkers money?” asked another user.
Times Are Hard for All
Though OP definitely wasn’t out of line for spending her own money on herself, it’s not a bad idea to acknowledge how tough it is out there.
Angela was out of line, but desperate people do desperate things, and a little empathy would go a long way. However, that doesn’t mean OP should give Angela money, only that we all should give Angela a tiny bit of grace as she struggles to get by.
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