Toxic masculinity hurts everyone. The idea that certain things are “unmanly,” so men must avoid them, permeates our culture.
Here are some of the most ridiculous things we’ve heard that “Real Men” avoid.
But First – A Disclaimer
The list of “unmanly” activities is ever-growing and constantly morphing. What was manly today may not be manly tomorrow, and it often depends on who you’re speaking with. Most of the items on the list drip with homophobia and misogyny.
The truth is anyone who identifies as a man is a real man. Real men can like what they want and be attracted to whomever they want. Your likes, profession, hobbies, and sexuality don’t determine your manhood.
Enjoy the list for what it is, a ridiculous portrayal of toxic masculinity in action. Enjoy the items proudly, secure in your manhood.
Real Men Don’t…
Now that that’s out of the way, here’s the list of ridiculous things “real men” can’t do.
Clearly, real men, like the most famous chefs in the world, must avoid the kitchen at all costs. Cooking is too “feminine” for men unless they’re getting paid to do it.
Real men pay full price. You must give up your man card if you’ve ever used a coupon for a discount.
A real man automatically knows how to put anything ever created together. It’s an innate ability. Reading the instructions is tantamount to admitting you’re not a man.
Men are only allowed to enjoy the bitter flavor of unsweetened coffee. Men who enjoy sweet flavors like cream and sugar aren’t real men.
Far too many men have weird hangups about washing their own bodies. They refuse to wash their unmentionables for fear that they might make them question their sexuality. We live in a strange world.
Say Good Morning
Apparently, a man saying “good morning” to another man is an invitation rather than a casual greeting. Real men must avoid this at all costs.
Travel in Comfort
Despite modern conveniences, a real man must bear all the burdens of travel to prove he’s worthy of the journey. Some think men should avoid roller suitcases and neck pillows because these incredible inventions that make travel easier are unmanly.
Protect their Skin
Men don’t need sunscreen. A real man would rather risk cancer than be caught slathering his skin with lotion.
The English will be sad to learn that a real man can’t drink tea. Apparently, the only warm drink men are allowed to enjoy is black coffee.
There’s some weird stigma about men and sweet things. Real Men can’t have dessert; it’s too sweet for their bitter hearts. Men also can’t enjoy fruity cocktails, fancy coffee drinks, chocolates, or carbs for breakfast.
Men are born with an epic sense of direction. A man always knows where he is at all times and never uses a map or GPS to help him navigate. Asking for directions is the ultimate strike against your manhood.
Dogs are masculine; cats are feminine. Any man who prefers the company of cats to dogs isn’t a real man.
The pervasive idea that men shouldn’t cry is one of the worst aspects of toxic masculinity. And it’s not just crying that’s frowned upon. Men aren’t allowed to show any emotion unless it’s anger. Therefore, they bottle everything up and eventually burst into shocking fits of rage.
It’s okay to cry. Let it all out fellows!
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Melanie launched Partners in Fire in 2017 to document her quest for financial independence with a mix of finance, fun, and solving the world’s problems. She’s self educated in personal finance and passionate about fighting systematic problems that prevent others from achieving their own financial goals. She also loves travel, anthropology, gaming and her cats.