Society loves forcing us into neat little boxes.
We’re hard workers and perfect consumers. We follow the 8-8-8 fantasy of work-life-sleep.
At work, we follow the “professional script,” using corporate lingo and serving with a smile. At home, we raise 2.5 perfect children and maintain a museum-quality home. Our hobbies include reading, sports, and anything “niche” that gets us into stores to spend more money.
The world wants us to conform. But you don’t have to.
Have the courage to be yourself despite society’s pressure to conform.
What is Social Conditioning?
Social conditioning is when people learn to think and behave in ways that are rewarded by society. They value the things society values, and do the things society expects.
Think of it like peer pressure, but on a massive scale. But it’s also more insidious, because while peer pressure is an overt push to get you to do something, social conditioning happens subconsciously.
Social conditioning helps society brainwash us into conforming.
How Society Brainwashes us Into Conformity
Society wants perfect cogs for the machine. It designs everything to force you into one of its boxes.
The media glorifies the police and military. Religions promote gender roles and child-rearing. Ads surround us, telling us to buy more and more and more.
It’s nearly impossible to escape, and those who don’t pay attention find themselves trapped.
Don’t believe me? Here are some of the most significant ways society destroys individualism with social conditioning.
School
The younger you are, the easier it is to brainwash you. Society starts its insidious plot the second you enter grade school.
Kids who can’t sit quietly and absorb knowledge, like the public school system wants them to, get left behind or medicated. We refuse to develop courses catered to different learning styles, instead insisting that every student must fit themselves into the perfect box. If they can’t, that’s just too bad – they get left behind.
Some districts offer special help to kids who don’t fit neatly into the box. Remedial classes, work-study programs, individualized education programs, and workshops help kids who don’t conform catch up.
But none of these special programs play to the kid’s strengths; they’re all designed to help the child fit themself into society’s box.
Earning a Living
It’s even worse when you’re an adult. Now, nobody cares if you fail. There are no safety nets to catch you if you try something different and fail. You end up in the street if you don’t do what they want.
If you come from a low-income family, your chances of making it as an artist, creator, scientist, academic, or inventor are slim to none. The folks who dedicate their lives to exploring the world around them and creating beautiful things add no value to investors, so society doesn’t care if they live or die.
People from wealthy families can afford to explore, but most of us can’t. If we don’t spend all our time working, we’ll end up homeless. Instead of creating epic works of art and solving the world’s biggest problems, the masses spend their time and energy toiling endlessly for minimum wage because if they stop, they’ll lose everything.
It’s Worse for women. They get the propaganda that they must become loving mothers, but society doesn’t actually value motherhood. It scoffs at the very notion of supporting women who wish to care for their children while telling them motherhood should be their primary life goal.
Society Values Profits Above All Else
Society only cares about mothers because it wants women to create more babies for the machine.
It pushes us all into jobs that make money because the goal is to get you to spend as much as possible to keep the machine going. It doesn’t care if you don’t have the aptitude to be a doctor or the physical intelligence to work a trade.
It wants you toiling because any other option would go against the house of cards it was built upon. We’re conditioned from childhood to value money above all else ~ and we often don’t have a choice because we need money to survive.
The Media
Our media bursts with propaganda telling us how to think. It starts from birth, with the earliest kids shows, and continues until the day we die.
Everything, from books to children’s shows to movies, showcases the ideal family as a mother, father, and children. Most conform to gender roles, with mom as the comforting nurturer and dad as the stern provider.
All women on TV want families; there’s no room for women to want anything else. The most iconic child-free women in the media are villains like Cruella De-Ville, while superheroes like Black Widow deem themselves “less than” because they can’t have kids. The child-free women who suddenly get pregnant do a complete 180 and decide they want children after all (Penny and Bernadette from The Big Bang Theory, Bones).
The media also promotes a pro-military, pro-police, and pro-religion ideal. How many films show the US as the glorious heroes saving the day? In contrast, how many movies highlight the questionable engagements the US engaged in? Every movie about the Vietnam War celebrates the Soldiers, but very few touch on the political agendas that forced the Soldiers to go there.
Advertisements
Constant messaging has one primary purpose: to get as much of your money as possible.
Our schools teach us to conform, our work culture keeps our minds numbs, and the media tells us what to think, all so we do exactly what it wants us to do: consume, consume, consume.
We buy things we don’t need so we’ll feel alive, if just for a moment. We go into debt for houses and cars to fit in with our neighbors and colleagues. We spend frivolously in a desperate attempt to find happiness that doesn’t exist.
It’s all by design, but you don’t have to stay stuck in the box.
How to Fight Back
Society tries so hard to stamp away individualism and force us into those neat little consumer boxes, but you don’t have to conform.
You can be yourself and find happiness in a world desperately trying to hold you back.
Here’s how to buck the system.
Recognize the Propaganda
You might scoff at the idea that society despises individualism. Society was built on it! Rugged individualism is one of the values Americans value most!
Take a moment to consider what that really means. How much of it is propaganda about a particular aesthetic?
Nearly everything you see, read, and consume has an angle (even this!). Learn to recognize it so you can think critically about the message it’s instilling.
Be the Change You Want to See
Cultural changes don’t happen in a vacuum. People just like you make it happen.
Change your behavior to shift the message of social conditioning. Start by valuing people for who they are rather than how they make money.
Instead of perpetuating the myth that we are only worth what we do by asking people, “What do you do?”, ask them what inspires them.
Ask people what their favorite hobbies are or what they do for fun. Support their artistic and creative endeavors.
We also have to change our cultural mindset about the value of work. Stop judging others for how they feed their families and show respect to the people earning the lowest wages or doing the dirtiest jobs. Everyone deserves human dignity, no matter how they earn their money.
Find Your True Self
Who are you without social conditioning?
Sometimes, the best way to fight back is to discover who you really are and live your truth.
Of course, you still have to play by the rules. You need a job to live, but you can reject consumerist culture. Money is crucial to survival, but you can pursue financial independence to get out of the rat race.
In the meantime, enjoy your hobbies, take care of yourself, and explore the world beyond the social conditioning you were injected with from youth.
Vote
Financial policy has a massive impact on our lives, even if we don’t always realize it. Wages, social programs, government spending, and education systems all help create society’s rules.
Voting can change the game. Support parties and platforms seeking to help regular people. Vote for policies that will raise wages, lower prices, and make it easier for people to pursue their interests over what makes a dollar.
Many people skip local elections, but that’s where it all starts. Your school board decides what kids learn. Your property taxes pay for education. States choose how to spend federal dollars. Voting in local elections is the best way to change your community.
Are You Ready to Reject Social Conditioning?
The world wants you to conform, but you don’t have to. Reject the social conditioning and live life on your own terms instead. I promise, you will be happier when you pursue what you truly want.