15 Lessons You Don’t Want to Learn the Hard Way – But You Probably Will

Life doesn’t always go the way we planned, sometimes fate gets in the way, and things change unexpectedly. 

Harsh Life Lessons

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The internet is a vast resource for learning lessons about life. While scrolling through one of my favorite Reddit subs, R/AskReddit, I stumbled upon a question asking users to share the most brutal lessons they learned as adults. 

The responses showcase the vast array of obstacles life can throw at us but also offer fantastic insight into human ingenuity and our ability to overcome. 

Here are some of the harsh life lessons Redditors have learned. 

Sometimes Bad Things Happen

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The top comment lamented the fates, saying, “Bad things happen to good people without reason or explanation.” They received over 2000 upvotes and numerous responses. 

Life isn’t fair. Sometimes things happen with no reason or explanation, both good and bad. On the plus side, when we accept that there are things we can’t change, we can focus on improving the things we can

The Bad Guys Can Win

Business man with his hands on his head and a sad look on his face as if he's stressed out.
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The inverse is also true. Sometimes the cheater gets the job, the thief lives a life of bliss, and the worst person you know has the best life. 

We must accept that life isn’t fair and do our best anyway. 

Chronic Illness

Young female doctor caring for an older female patient.
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Another user mentioned that chronic illness could strike anyone at any time. Developing a condition can decimate your savings and throw your goals off track. 

Of course, as many Redditors pointed out, the risk of developing a chronic illness is made much worse by the lack of affordable healthcare and safety nets for those unable to work in America. 

Quality Beats Quantity in Friendships

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It’s better to have one amazing friend than a cadre of acquaintances. 

Friendships take a lot of work to grow and maintain. Focus on nurturing a few deep, meaningful relationships instead of trying to support many shallow ones. 

Time Flies

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One Redditor scored gold by noting how quickly time passes, especially as we age. They said, “If there’s something you want to do in life, don’t wait if you do, you might find five years have passed without you doing anything.”

It’s true. We often have lofty dreams that we never turn into reality. When setting your life goals, be sure to include an action plan on how to achieve them. 

Relationships End

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“Sometimes you just have to walk away, let people go, and let relationships end,” commented one user. Another said that friendships sometimes slowly drift away. 

As much as we might want to maintain relationships, we need to understand that each one isn’t meant to last. Let relationships go when they’ve run their course, and look back fondly on the time you enjoyed together. 

You Can’t Always Help

Man sitting with his hands near his chin, sadly thinking and seriously thinking
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Sometimes we will watch the people we love make terrible decisions, regardless of the advice we give them. 

One Redditor reminded us that we can’t always help. People have to make their own decisions, whether we agree with them or not. 

You Can’t Force Love

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You can’t make anyone love you, and you can’t force yourself to love anyone else, offered one astute user. 

Don’t try to force it. You can’t make someone be in a relationship with you or want to pursue a friendship with you. 

You’re All You’ve Got

Smiling man pointing to himself
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When it comes down to it, the only person you can rely on is yourself. Sure, you may have friends and family willing to offer a helping hand, but you can’t always count on it, and you have to be able to take care of yourself. 

Another user agreed but considered it as a positive. Why worry about what others think when they won’t be there for you anyway? Live your life on your own terms without letting others hold you back. 

Networking Matters

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One Redditor offered the sage “When searching for a job, “it’s not what you know, it’s who you know” is true more often than not.”

On the plus side, you can overcome this by nurturing professional relationships, joining organizations, and being personable at work. 

They Won’t Fix It

A couple sits at the breakfast table. She's trying to make him happy by giving him breakfast but he doesn't care.
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Everyone has that one person in their life who caused a world of trauma. We want them to aknowledge all the hurt they caused and make amends, but the harsh truth is they probably never will. The best we can do is cut this person out of our life and prevent them from hurting us even more. 

No One Cares

Man shrugging his shoulders like he doesn't care at all.
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Out of the thousands of people you meet in your life, most will forget you. Most people are too tied up in their own lives to remember others. 

Though it sounds harsh, it’s actually a bonus. When you realize no one cares as much as you think, you’re free to do what you want. 

Financial Health Matters

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We don’t often consider the impact of financial decisions when young, but once we reach adulthood, we realize how important financial responsibility really is. One commenter said, “Years worth of smart decisions can be undone in a few months of negligence or mistakes and severely limit your ability to operate in the adult/family world.”

They’re right. A red mark on your credit report or a bad investment can derail any financial plan. Those who don’t plan for their financial future may never be able to retire. 

It’s vital to invest time in your finances when young. Start saving and investing as early and as often as possible, and revisit your financial goals regularly to ensure you stay on track. 

The Debt Trap

Student loan debt burden concept. Woman struggles to climb a ladder resting on school books while carrying a massive box of debt on her back.
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Debt keeps us stuck in a cycle of indentured servitude. Far too many of us fall into the trap when we’re young and don’t know any better, and it takes us years to dig out. 

People are Selfish

Proud looking selfish man wearing a crown looking down on others.
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Most people are too concerned about themselves to think of others. While good people exist, it’s harder and harder to find them in the sea of selfishness. 

Here are the top red flags you’re dealing with a selfish person

Find Fulfillment in Life Despite the Harshness

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With the hustle and bustle of daily life, we often forget to take time to do what makes us happy.

Here are 37 tips to help you live your best life
 

What’s an Empath?

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Empaths can read other people’s emotions. Find out how it works and whether you may have some empathic abilities! 

Learn More: Experts Reveal Top Signs of an Empath

Achieve Financial Independence with Stress Free Part Time Work

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Wouldn’t it be great if you could work part time at an easy, stress free job you love? Barista Fire is the path to financial independence that lets you do just that!

What’s Chaotic Neutral?

Close up of a woman with a serious face holding a piece of popcorn in her hand like she's about to eat it. It looks like she's immersed in the drama of whatever she's watching.
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Our favorite charactors in film and shows tend to lean toward the chaotic. Find out why we love this character archetype so much!

Harsh Life Lessons

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What do you think? Was the internet right in calling these harsh life lessons? Some might be apt, but on the plus side, we can use this list to live our best life despite them. 

Nurture meaningful friendships, let go of things you can’t control, and focus on living your best life.