Life doesn’t always go the way we planned. Fate has a weird way of getting in the way, changing things in the most unexpected ways imaginable.
The hard life lessons learned from fate’s drastic interference often come at the worst times.
Why didn’t anyone warn us?
Hard Life Lessons to Learn the Easy Way
What if you could learn the most crucial life lessons without the heartache?
We scoured the internet, searching for harsh life lessons people learned the hardest way imaginable, so you can learn them the easy way.
Sometimes Bad Things Happen
In fairy tale worlds, bad things happen for a reason. The villain pointed their magic wand and unleashed evil upon the world, but the hero always saves the day.
Unfortunately, real life isn’t a fairy tale. Sometimes bad things happen to good people without any reason or explanation. It’s unfair, shocking, and life-altering when it happens.
On the plus side, knowing and accepting this hard life lesson before you experience a run of bad luck can help you navigate it. You can let go of the just world fallacy and offer empathy to others experiencing hardships, and focus on the things you can control when fate’s terrifying hand turns your way.
The Bad Guys Can Win
The bad guys always lose in fairy tales, but not so much in real life. Sometimes the cheater gets the job, the thief lives a life of bliss, and the worst person you know has the best life.
We must accept that life isn’t fair and do our best anyway.
Chronic Illness
Chronic illness could strike anyone at any time. Developing a condition can decimate your savings and throw your goals off track.
Of course, the risk of developing a chronic illness is made much worse by the lack of affordable healthcare and safety nets for those unable to work in America. Maybe the lesson here is that we should show more empathy and support for the disabled and promote programs that help lift them out of poverty before an illness strikes us, too.
Quality Beats Quantity in Friendships
When we’re young adults, we surround ourselves with hundreds of friends so we don’t have to feel alone. As we grow, the friendships fade as we’re forced to cut the users and drama seekers out of our lives.
If only we realized from the start that it’s better to have one amazing friend than a cadre of acquaintances, we would have saved ourselves a ton of heartache.
Friendships take a lot of work to grow and maintain. Focus on nurturing a few deep, meaningful relationships instead of trying to support many shallow ones.
Time Flies
Don’t wait for “someday” to pursue what you want from life. If you wait, you might find that five, then 10 years have passed, and you haven’t accomplished anything.
We don’t always realize how quickly the time passes, until one day you look up and the prime of your life is over.
Stop waiting for that elusive someday and start doing things today. Make an action plan for your life goals and revisit it often, so time doesn’t escape you.
Relationships End
Antonio Guillem via Shutterstock.com.
Not every relationship is meant to last. Sometimes you have to walk away and let people go, even if you care for them deeply. Sometimes a cherished relationship fades so much that you barely even remember what you’re holding onto.
The sooner you accept the hard truth that every relationship will eventually end, the easier it will be to navigate when it happens.
Let relationships go when they’ve run their course, and look back fondly on the time you enjoyed together.
You Can’t Always Help
Sometimes we are forced to watch the people we love make terrible decisions, and nothing we can do or say will sway them.
Try as we might, we can’t help them. We can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.
People have to make their own decisions, whether we agree with them or not. Let it go and stop trying so hard to help. The stress will melt away.
You Can’t Force Love
You can’t make anyone love you, and you can’t force yourself to love anyone else. Sometimes we try, though, and it ends up backfiring spectacularly, leaving us worse off than ever before.
Don’t learn this life lesson the hard way.
You can’t make someone be in a relationship with you or want to pursue a friendship with you. If they aren’t feeling it, stop trying to force it. It’s better to be with someone who loves and respects you than to try to force a relationship with someone who doesn’t care about you.
You’re All You’ve Got
When it comes down to it, the only person you can rely on is yourself. Sure, you may have friends and family willing to offer a helping hand, but you can’t always count on it, and you have to be able to take care of yourself.
Though it’s a hard life lesson to learn when times are bad, there’s a bright side. Why worry about what others think when they won’t be there for you anyway? Live your life on your own terms without letting others hold you back.
Networking Matters
The old saying, “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know,” rings true far more often than not.
Networking matters. Relationships matter. You might be the most talented person in the room, but if people don’t know you, why would they take a chance on you? And if they don’t like you, why would they put up with you if they could hire someone a little less experienced but much easier to get along with?
On the plus side, you can overcome this by nurturing professional relationships, joining organizations, and being personable at work.
They Won’t Fix It
Everyone has that one person in their life who caused a world of trauma. We want them to acknowledge all the hurt they caused and make amends, but the harsh truth is they probably never will.
The best we can do is cut this person out of our lives and prevent them from hurting us even more. We should also forgive them, because holding onto anger causes health problems, but that doesn’t mean we should forget.
No One Cares
Out of the thousands of people you meet in your life, most will forget you. Most people are too tied up in their own lives to remember others. They won’t remember or care that you tripped up on a word or got their name wrong.
Though it sounds harsh, it’s actually a bonus. When you realize no one cares as much as you think, you’re free to do what you want.
Financial Health Matters
We don’t often consider the impact of financial decisions when young, but once we reach adulthood, we realize how important financial responsibility really is.
One mistake can wreak havoc on your financial life for years. A red mark on your credit report or a bad investment can derail any financial plan. Those who don’t plan for their financial future may never be able to retire.
It’s vital to invest time in your finances when young. Start saving and investing as early and often as possible, and revisit your financial goals regularly to ensure you stay on track.
The Debt Trap
Debt keeps us stuck in a cycle of indentured servitude. Far too many of us fall into the trap when we’re young and don’t know any better, and it takes us years to dig out.
Avoid taking on debt if you can. Unfortunately, with college education skyrocketing, loans are the only option. However, there are ways to make college cheaper. Seek out scholarships and grants, choose inexpensive state schools, and maintain a part-time job to help pay your expenses while in school.
Above all, avoid credit card debt. Don’t buy things you don’t need with money you don’t have.
People are Selfish
Most people are too concerned about themselves to think of others. While good people exist, it’s harder and harder to find them in the sea of selfishness.
Learning this hard life lesson early will help you keep your guard up, so you can identify selfish people before they burn you.
Some People Only Like You if You’re Useful
Speaking of selfish people, many of them will pretend to like you when you’re useful to them. This life lesson hits hardest when those folks are the people closest to you – like parents or a romantic partner.
When you eventually see that they only like you because of what you do for them, it will hurt. You’ll feel unlovable and lose faith in humanity (please don’t ask how I know).
But after you learn this lesson, you can start to spot the signs. Ask your partner what they love about you, and watch for how many “I love that you do X for me” statements versus “I love your (drive, ambition, intelligence, creativity, etc.) statements.
Stop going above and beyond for the people who don’t value you for who you are.
You’re Responsible
vchal via Shutterstock.com.
The hardest life lesson to learn is that you, yes YOU, are ultimately responsible for your life. We may want to blame our parents, or our high school flame who cheated 20 years ago, or a teacher who gave us a bad grade, but at the end of the day, your life is your responsibility, no one else’s.
The sooner you learn that and take responsibility for everything, the good and the bad, the better off your life will be.
Don’t Learn These Harsh Life Lessons the Hard Way
We’re trying to give you the easy way out, but if you have to learn from experience, don’t blame us.
Come back and leave a comment, letting us know how true these hard life lessons really are, and maybe you can help prevent someone else from learning the hard way like you did.