10 Beloved Wedding Traditions With Super Sexist Origins

As the bride and groom head down the aisle to say their “I dos,” they may not realize how many wedding traditions exist due to sexism. 

These wedding and marriage traditions are all about misogyny. 

Asking Permission

man proposing at a public cafe.
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The sexism in wedding traditions starts well before the proposal. The hopeful groom must seek permission to wed from a woman’s rightful owner, her father!

Father of the Bride Pays

An older man with grey hair smiles and holds up a credit card.
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Many cultures devalue women so much fathers pay men to marry them. The dowry lives on today with the expectation that the bride’s father will pay. 

A White Dress

Pretty bride on pink background.
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White symbolizes purity. The white dress shows the world that the bride is worthy of marriage because she kept herself chaste before. 

And the Veil

close up of a bride's face covered with a thin, elegant veil.
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The lifting of the veil symbolizes the groom’s permission to break another thin membrane.

Giving the Bride Away

A father walks his daughter down the aisle to her waiting groom.
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Historically, weddings were property transfers. A father’s property (his daughter) was transferred to the groom. Nowhere is this old idea of marriage more apparent than in the tradition where the father literally “gives the bride away” to her groom.

Honor and Obey

Happy Bride and Groom embracing at their wedding.
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Many marriage vows still contain the words “honor and obey,” but only for the women. Men don’t have to obey their wives; that’s ridiculous. 

Groomsmen

male friends smiling and hugging.
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Groomsmen weren’t always the groom’s best pals! They were his right-hand fighters, ready to battle the bride and her family should they attempt to fight the marriage. 

The Garter Toss

The groom bends down and holds the bride's ankle as he's about to reach for her garter.
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The garter toss symbolizes consummation, proving to the  world that the bride has been deflowered, 

Carrying Her Over the Threshold

A groom carries his bride over his shoulder.
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In ancient times, women had no choice in marriage. They’d attempt to fight off their grooms, who simply grabbed them and dragged them home. 

Changing Names

Black and white photo depicting a bride and groom at the altar but neither looks happy.
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The misogyny continues after the wedding with the expectation that the woman, not the man, will change her last name, cementing his ownership. 

Marriage Isn’t for Everyone

Young hopeful woman looking up at a beautiful sunrise.
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Society set up a tidy little life script we’re all supposed to follow – but we don’t have to. 

Here’s why you should ditch the life script and live life on your own terms

Women Are Leaving Their Husbands In Droves

Happy woman with her hand on a roller suitcase.
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Walk away wife syndrome is all about weaponized incompetence. Women are fed up and leaving men who don’t contribute. 

Here’s what woman say about it

Complex Feelings About Being a Female Breadwinner

Pretty money throwing money around on a light pink background
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As female breadwinners are on the rise, it’s important to discuss the complex feelings that can arise when we shrug off societal expectations

Avoid Hobosexuals

man smiling holding a heart cut out over his heart on a red background to show he's in love
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Some men are only looking for a free ride. They date woman so they have free housing and don’t have to lift a finger to help.

Here are some red flags that the guy you’re dating doesn’t want you, he wants to live comfortably off your hard work

Giant Waving Red Flags That Your Relationship is Toxic

older woman with facial expression showing dislike and giving a thumbs down sign
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It’s hard to tell that you’re in a toxic relationship when you’re in the thick of it. If any of these red flags sound familiar, you may want to rethink your relationship. 
 

Author: Melanie Allen

Title: Journalist

Expertise: Pursuing Your Passions, Travel, Wellness, Hobbies, Finance, Gaming, Happiness

Melanie Allen is an American journalist and happiness expert. She has bylines on MSN, the AP News Wire, Wealth of Geeks, Media Decision, and numerous media outlets across the nation and is a certified happiness life coach. She covers a wide range of topics centered around self-actualization and the quest for a fulfilling life.