Life requires a certain set of skills.
We need social skills, financial skills, and a wide range of so-called “life skills” to navigate the world successfully.
Well, maybe “need” is a strong word, because all too many people lack vital life skills, leaving the rest of us scratching our heads in awe, wondering how they even survive.
But it’s not just a “them” problem. When a majority of people (or even a large enough minority) lack vital life skills, society as a whole suffers, leading to problems for us all.
Crucial Life Skills Too Many People Don’t Have
Today, we’re highlighting the most essential life skills lacking in the US, why it’s a problem for society, and hopefully, what we can do about it.
Finding Information
Millennials and younger generations are spoiled, and we don’t even know it.
For the first time in history, the vast wealth of human knowledge is available at our fingertips. We can find data, research, and facts in seconds.
But we don’t.
Instead, we rely on other people to do our thinking for us. We watch videos of YouTubers spouting the most ridiculous claims and take it as gospel, refusing to do even a cursory fact check.
And what’s worse is we call that “research.”
Actual real information is at our fingertips, yet we don’t even know how to look. We don’t want to know.
Separating Fact from Opinion
People spout opinions like hard truths, and far too many lack the skills to tell the difference.
A “feeling” about something doesn’t make it true.
The funny thing about this is that the “facts don’t care about your feelings” crowd is often the worst offender. They make ridiculous claims about race and gender, backing them up with “evidence” they call rational that really only serves their interests.
The real hard facts actually prove them wrong, but they dismiss anything that doesn’t support their opinions.
As a wise person once said, “You can’t reason someone out of an opinion they didn’t reason themselves into.”
People swear up and down that their opinions are “factual” without having any idea of what “factual” really means.
Critical Thinking
Our inability to find information or separate fact from opinion both stem from another lacking life skill: critical thinking.
Critical thinking makes us actually think about things before forming an opinion. It helps us to view a story with unbiased eyes and think about different perspectives before deciding if it’s true.
When we think critically about something, we use our vast past knowledge and our working brains to consider who is sharing the information, who benefits from us believing it, what their goals are, whether they’re trustworthy, and why they might be biased.
The skill prevents us from taking everything we see at face value and believing only what we want to believe.
Lack of critical thinking becomes more apparent in a world filled with AI slop. Millions of people can’t tell the difference between AI and reality – even in the most obvious of cases. It will only get worse as the technology improves.
Financial Literacy
Financial literacy is vital in a society that celebrates rugged individualism above all else. We have very few safety nets for people who make mistakes, but at the same time, we refuse to teach people how to properly manage their money.
I don’t remember learning anything about finance while in school. I didn’t have any classes on credit scores, interest rates (except maybe a handful of algebra problems), investing, 401Ks, or understanding how money works.
Nobody taught me the difference between wants and needs, how to build a budget, or how to think about (or prioritize) my financial goals.
Everything I learned, I learned on my own. And I was lucky enough to have access!
We’re failing our kids by refusing to teach them financial literacy, then expecting them to take care of themselves financially from the time they’re 18 (while burdening them with tens of thousands of dollars of student loan debt – but that’s another story!).
People who don’t learn financial skills don’t know how to budget, spend recklessly, and ignore major financial milestones like saving for a home or retirement.
These folks become poverty-stricken seniors relying on Medicaid in their later years to avoid homelessness.
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Don’t trust us? I get it. We’re on Etsy too (for a tiny bit more).
Emotional Regulation
Public freakouts wouldn’t be so common if people knew how to control their emotions. Alas, they do not, and the rest of us are left watching cringe-inducing blowouts over the most ridiculous things.
I’ve seen people throw coffee into baristas’ faces, scream at children during youth sports, flip out over an incorrect order, and get so angry at other drivers that they become reckless on the road.
These emotional outbursts can lead to tragedy. We see road rage incidents, family annihilators, domestic violence, and all sorts of news stories where someone meets a horrific end because someone else couldn’t control their emotions.
It destroys numerous lives and makes society more dangerous for everyone.
You can feel however you want about any situation, but please learn how to control yourself.
Compromise
Compromise does not mean the other person has to do what you want. That’s not compromise; that’s actually you getting your way. See the difference?
You can’t insist that the other person meet you where you are, refuse to budge, and claim they’re the one not compromising.
I see this all the time in both relationships and politics (which have a lot of similarities, if you think about it). One side of the aisle will claim the other side isn’t “compromising” because they refuse to vote for an issue or give in to ridiculous demands. But the side demanding isn’t offering anything in return – it’s their way or the highway.
Compromising means finding a solution that works for everyone, not forcing your will upon everyone else.
And the worst thing here is that I think most people really do have this life skill – they just don’t use it because they’d rather bulldoze the other party to get what they want.
Why compromise when you can be a toxic person and get your way instead?
Maybe because society needs compromise to thrive?
Driving
Millions of people hop in their 2-ton killing machines and nonchalantly swerve through lanes, oblivious to the dangers of high-speed impacts and the notion that other drivers share the road.
I get it. Humans didn’t evolve to operate killing machines. It’s a modern invention we were all thrust into, and human ingenuity made them all too easy to operate.
But drivers – please! Pay attention while on the road. Driving is a vital life skill that can save your life – literally.
Take it seriously.
Effective Communication
Communication is far more than talking. People often forget that active listening, empathy, tone, and body language are crucial to effective communication and wonder why no one understands each other.
We’re all too busy talking past each other, waiting for our turn to speak, and thinking about how we’re going to respond instead of actually listening to what the other party is saying.
But it’s not just talking. Reading and writing are also vital to proper communication. According to Global Statistics, 21% of American adults, upwards of 43 million people, struggle with basic reading. And our children are faring worse, with 34% of fourth graders unable to read.
Our literacy score has been declining since 2017, and that’s a massive problem for everyone. How can we understand what’s happening in the world when we can’t read? How can we communicate effectively when we can’t write?
Self Awareness
Are you aware of how your actions impact other people? Can you examine your biases, faults, and moments of hypocrisy?
And please don’t say you don’t have any – we all do. It’s part of being human. But the fact that you think you don’t highlights my point- self-awareness is a vital life skill lacking in a lot of people.
Everyone thinks they’re perfect and blames everyone else for their own shortfalls.
They happily shout and scream about everyone else, refusing to look inward at their own faults. They point their fingers all around them without any idea that they’re wrong too.
For society to move forward, we all must look inward, accept that we aren’t perfect, and make efforts to improve ourselves.
You can’t fix a problem if you refuse to admit that you have one.
Understanding Others
Naive people everywhere constantly encounter manipulative jerks looking to take advantage (🙋♀️ it’s me – I’m naive people).
Learning to read people and understand their true intentions is worth cultivating. It will save you from horrible people seeking to use you.
But understanding others is a life skill worth cultivating for more than self-preservation. It helps you become a better friend and a better citizen.
And leads to an even more crucial skill…
Empathy
Empathy takes understanding others a step forward. It helps us connect with others on an emotional level. We can share their sorrows and joys, understand their point of view, and relate to their hardships.
When you seek to understand with empathy, you can relate to a person’s perspective. It helps you realize that the world does not, in fact, revolve around you, that your experiences aren’t universal, and that other people experience the world in a wide range of different ways.
Once we understand that, we can start making an effort to improve society for everyone, not just from a single point of view.
If we started teaching and valuing empathy at a young age, many of our societal ills would vanish.
Self-Advocacy
Far too many people cannot stand up for themselves. I’m one of them.
I struggle to set boundaries in relationships, to speak up at the doctor’s office, and to stand up to my siblings when they behave poorly.
But I know it’s a crucial life skill I lack, and I try to improve every day.
You should too. Self-advocacy helps us in so many ways. It prevents us from being steamrolled at home and at work, keeps us healthy, and makes us feel empowered to live our lives on our own terms.
Grace and Tact
People don’t know how to tactfully share sensitive information or react to that information with grace.
We insult people when they’re wrong, and they lash out in defense. Nobody wins.
The worst offenders are the bullies who spout awful cruelties under the guise of honesty. They claim they’re “just being honest” when in fact they’re just being mean.
There’s a way to tell someone harsh truths without being a jerk. And I know it sometimes hurts to hear the truth, but (going back to emotional regulation) there’s a way to accept it with grace.
Learning how to deliver (and accept) constructive criticism is vital, both at work and at home.
We’d all be better off if more people knew how to explain things tactfully and accept things gracefully.
Swimming
Most of the lacking life skills discussed are about human interaction, building society, and being good people, but we absolutely have to take the opportunity to discuss one life-saving skill:
Swimming.
Everyone should know how to tread water for a few minutes. You’ll probably never need it, but you’ll be glad you know how if a situation ever arises where swimming could save your life.
Why Society Needs These Life Skills
The best societies are filled with happy, healthy, confident people.
When people know how to communicate, set boundaries, care about each other, and manage their own lives, society thrives. When they don’t – well, I think we’re seeing what happens with our own eyes.
Society crumbles. We embrace scarcity mindsets, search for the easy way out, stop thinking for ourselves, and lean into the worst aspects of human behavior (rage, fear, etc.).
How Can We Fix the Problem?
The good news is we can fix it. We don’t have to accept the loss of these vital life skills.
It starts with education. I believe critical thinking is the most crucial skill on this list. When people know how to think, they can can separate fact from fiction, learn financial management on their own, see when they’re being manipulated, and understand others.
We need to fund schools but stop teaching for “tests”. We need to start teaching children how to think from a young age. Let them read stories and try to figure out what the author was trying to say. Teach them real algebra so they learn to use logic to solve problems. Host lessons on how propaganda works and how to spot it.
In addition, we must lean into empathy. When we teach kids empathy, we teach them to value the thoughts and perspectives of others.
These two enhancements alone would work wonders toward solving a lot of society’s problems – don’t you think?