Sometimes you have an epiphany – an instantaneous realization of exactly what you want, or maybe of what went wrong. But sometimes it’s not instantaneous. Sometimes it’s a slow dawning realization that takes weeks or months to come to terms with. That’s how the realization that I regret getting pets came to me.
I love My Pets
Ok, before the brigade of pet lovers starts crucifying me– hear me out. I have four cats and two dogs, and I love the little buggers. I would never dump them at a shelter or give them less than the care that they deserve. Since I adopted them, they are a part of the family. They are my responsibility, and I will do my best to make sure each and every one of them has the longest, most comfortable life possible. I mean seriously, I spent over four thousand dollars this year on vet bills for one of my cats!
So now that I got that disclaimer out of the way, let me talk about why I regret getting pets. Maybe it will help someone just starting out in life decide to wait on pet ownership, and maybe it will help others realize that adopting a pet is in fact the right choice for them.
Why Do I Regret Getting Pets?
As much as I love them, I can’t help but think about how much different my life would be if I didn’t have them. I could have taken that job in California, or found a place to rent in Savannah and Pennsylvania rather than buying a home. I could quit my job on a whim and travel the world, or even do something as simple as take a spontaneous vacation. Unfortunately, none of these things are feasible with the pets that I have.
I Regret Getting a Dog
I think the dogs are a bigger regret than the cats. Cats are easy – I was able to take weekend trips whenever I wanted when I just had them. But that’s just not possible with the dogs. You absolutely can’t leave them alone and go on an overnight trip, much less an entire weekend get-away. I mean sure, you could be a terrible pet owner and leave the dog chained up outside for its entire life and not worry about such things, but that’s just not my style. I consider all my pets to be members of the family, and I would never subject them to that type of treatment. So, it’s either hire a pet-sitter, take them with, or make it a day trip – all of which limit you in one way or another.
It’s not just the trips though (although with my love of travel and adventure, that’s a huge part of it). The dogs are also crazy expensive. Their food costs thirty bucks every two weeks, and I’m constantly paying vet bills. I have them on a wellness plan, so I’m paying a hundred bucks a month just for that (to be fair, I’m canceling it this year).
Lack of Mobility
But the biggest issues with having the dogs is the limitations on housing. Do you have any idea how many landlords refuse to rent to someone with a dog over fifty pounds? If you guessed most of them, you’d be right. I regret getting my dogs because having them has seriously limited my mobility. I can’t look for better opportunities elsewhere because moving is prohibitively expensive. I’d have to sell a house and then buy a new house. Both of those things cost tons of money unless you can get lucky and sell in a massive real estate upswing.
A few months ago, I got the most amazing job offer of my life. It was for nearly 120K per year, and it was back in Long Beach, CA. As you all know, I turned the job down. My official reason is that moving back California won’t help me on the path to financial freedom, and while that’s technically true, it’s only true because I have so many pets.
The real reason I turned the job down is because of all of my pets. Moving back to California with them would be incredibly expensive. Finding a home where we could all live in the area would cost me more than the raise every year – in fact I doubt I’d be able to afford it at all.
The thing is, if I didn’t have them, I would have taken the job. I could have easily found a one-bedroom apartment or roommate situation for around 1000 a month in the area (ok-maybe not easily, but those options do exist). After my housing costs, I’d still be taking home over 100K a year. That would be totally worth it for a few years, and it would actually help me on my journey to financial independence.
I Regret Getting a Cat
Truthfully, I don’t regret my cats as much as I regret my dogs. They are much easier to take care. When I was just a crazy cat lady, I could take weekend trips and not have to worry about whether they’d destroy the house when I was gone. Sure, they’d get mad and throw a few things off the counter, but overall, they can take care of themselves for a few days.
However, I do regret getting four cats. Even I acknowledge that’s a bit much. If I just had two cats like a normal person, I’d be able to do most of the things that I want to do. I could have found a cheap one-bedroom rental in California that accepts cats. I could move them cross-country without having to stop every two hours (ok, to be fair, most of that is for me).
But still, even with just one cat, my dreams of travelling the world would have to be put on hold. Cats don’t travel well, and there are tons of rules and restrictions to bringing domestic animals across international borders. And with four cats, it’s basically a pipe dream.
What Should You Do if You Regret Getting Pets?
My first instinct is to tell you to suck it up and take care of the pet. It’s part of your family. But I know that’s not realistic or appropriate for everyone. If you have pet and can no longer offer it the care that it deserves, it’s perfectly acceptable to re-home it.
However, you should do your research before re-homing a pet. Make sure you are giving your pet away to good owners, where it will be happy, healthy, and well taken care of. Here are some great tips for re-homing if that’s what you need to do.
Please avoid dropping your pet off at a shelter, they are so overrun with homeless animals that most only get a few days to get adopted -and get euthanized if they don’t. If you can’t find a good new home, at least find a no kill shelter.
What am I Going to Do?
As I said above, I’m going to continue living my life and taking care of my six babies to the best of my ability. I’m more than capable of taking care of them, and they do enhance my life in many immeasurable ways.
I didn’t write this because I’m going to give them up, or change anything that I’m doing. It’s more of a cathartic post. I’m writing it to acknowledge my feelings, and let others who may be in the same situation know that they aren’t alone. People don’t talk about these types of regrets and the ways that having pets can hold them back, but I think it’s important to have these conversations. It can prevent people from getting pets who probably shouldn’t have them. In addition, it can give others a realistic idea of what to expect if they choose to adopt.
So, if you regret getting pets, it’s not the end of the world. It doesn’t make you a bad person. In fact, it’s best to acknowledge the feelings you are having so you can decide what the best way to move forward is, for both you and them.