13 Toxic Social Norms People Are Starting to Reject

Society evolves exponentially, but it doesn’t always change for the better. Sometimes the “new normals” are worse for everyone. 

These toxic social norms start small and then seep into every aspect of our lives. Before we know it, “everyone does it” and “it’s always been that way.”

But it doesn’t have to be. 

Rejecting Social Norms

We can reject these toxic social norms that society pushes. 

And the good news is that it’s already happening. 

Here are the top toxic social norms society wants you to be okay with that people are already starting to reject. 

Are you?

Social Media Journaling

Social media is a fantastic way to keep in touch with people around the country and stay informed about the latest happenings in the world. 

However, many people use it as a personal journal, airing all their dirty laundry for everyone to see. 

We don’t need to share the innermost details of our lives with the whole world. 

I actually think this is getting much better (but for the wrong reasons). My feeds are filled with AI slop and influencers I don’t follow, so I rarely even see posts from my friends. People may eventually realize there’s no point to posting about their drama because nobody will see it anyway. 

Phones in General

Social media isn’t the problem – it’s the phones. 

People are glued to their smartphones at all hours of the day. They can’t even stop scrolling while driving. 

I’m trying to reject this new toxic social norm by reading a book in the evening instead of doom scrolling – and I have to admit – it’s tough. I can’t stop wanting to reach for my phone to discover the nothingness inside. 

Unfortunately, I think this is getting worse not better. However, some countries are at least trying to restrict children’s access to phones. 

Working While Sick

COVID should have taught us valuable lessons about staying home while sick, but unfortunately, American Work Culture won’t allow a paradigm shift. 

People don’t have sick leave, so they can either work while sick or stay home and skip a paycheck (while also risking their jobs). 

The toxic social norm makes life worse for everyone. Workers don’t have the opportunity to recover, and they also spread their germs to unsuspecting colleagues and customers. 

I don’t know why we allow this. 

Those who can afford to stay home should do their best to stop normalizing working while sick. 

Monetize All the Hobbies

Hustle culture tells us that if we’re not making money, we’re living wrong. 

The toxic idea that we must be hustling makes people try to put a value on everything that brings joy to life – including their hobbies. 

Want to paint? Where are you selling your work? How dare you write for fun? You must publish eBooks! 

People can no longer exist without trying to make money every waking moment. 

Everything Costing Too Much

I do understand why everyone is trying to monetize every aspect of their lives. It’s due to another toxic social norm everyone seems to just accept: The absurd cost of living. 

We did the math. It costs nearly $75,000 just to live in America. Average salaries haven’t kept up with the rising cost of living. 

But instead of revolting, we’ve just accepted it. We monetize our hobbies, work extra hours, and even take second jobs just to survive. 

Unfortunately, most of us don’t have the option to reject this social norm. We have to do what we have to do to survive. 

Subscription Services

I loathe the shift to subscription services for everything. 

What happened to the days when I could buy a disk loaded with Microsoft Office and use that on every computer?

They’re gone, because Microsoft (and every other company in existence) realized they’d make more money renting us software than selling us software. 

And the trend is expanding. Car companies make us pay a subscription for seat warmers and automatic starters, game developers leaned into the subscription model for games, and I bet companies in other industries are trying to figure out how they can profit from this model, too. 

We can reject this new normal by refusing to shop at companies that only offer subscriptions. 

Endless Consumption

Society tells us we need to buy more and more to be happy, but many folks are pushing back against it. 

We don’t need to fill our homes with useless junk. It might fill a void for a brief second, but it won’t bring lasting happiness. 

I think a lot of us have realized that challenges, connection, and experiences bring far more happiness than stuff. 

Constant Filming

I am so glad I came of age before everyone had a smartphone. Society’s new normal seems to be endless filming for social media content. 

Unfortunately, the younger generations don’t seem to be rejecting this social norm. 

Look, we don’t need to film every mistake everyone makes and post it online for eternity. Stop making a stranger’s worst day even worse. 

Instead, put down the phone and, I don’t know, maybe offer to help?

Food Delivery

Up until a few years ago, very few companies offered food delivery. You could get pizza, sandwiches, and maybe Chinese food. 

With all the delivery services, anything we want is a click away for the right price. And let me tell you, that price is probably much more than you’d pay if you picked it up yourself. 

But it’s worth it for a lot of people who don’t want to leave the house (or cook on their own). This toxic social norm of ever-increasing laziness should be rejected. 

Of course, advances in food delivery have been a massive boon for disabled folks who can’t drive or cook, so I’m glad we have these as options. I’m also not opposed to ordering DoorDash on occasion. Everyone needs a break, and the fact that able-bodied folks order it ensures it’s available for folks with disabilities. 

I’m not asking that we completely reject food delivery, only that we find a better balance. 

Consumer Debt

People don’t worry that they can’t afford things; they simply take on more debt to get what they want. It’s so normal that people don’t even hesitate to pay with plastic. 

And it’s getting worse. People use services like Klarna to pay for their food delivery services on credit, racking up even more debt, interest, and fees. 

Just how much is debt normalized? The Fed’s most recent consumer debt report shows America’s outstanding debt (excluding mortgage payments) reaching over five trillion dollars. 

Nearly everyone carries some credit card debt, and a lot of us are way too casual with our spending. I hope one day we realize how much of a trap it really is. 

Amazon

The shopping behemoth changed the world, but not entirely for the better. Amazon made it easier than ever to grab cheap products from overseas and is notorious for treating workers poorly. 

People who can afford alternatives do God’s work by rejecting the cheap platform. 

Celebrity Worship

Our society treats celebrities and politicians like Kings and Queens. We place these folks on pedestals and defend their honor against even the truth. 

I don’t understand it. Sure, following a celebrity can be fun, but why do we care about their personal life, and why do we feel the need to defend their poor behavior? 

But it’s even worse with politicians. We elect these folks to serve us, then turn around and treat them like kings. That’s not how it was supposed to work. We need to hold them accountable and make them do their jobs. 

Many reject this worship culture and try to see people for who they are, but sadly, not enough. 

Crypto

Tech bros sing crypto’s praises, but many people are rightly concerned. It’s unregulated and more like gambling than an investment. 

Thankfully, I haven’t seen as much hype about crypto in recent years. Maybe that’s just because I’m off Twitter, but I’m hoping it’s because more people realize the dangers and reject the social push to “buy more crypto.”

Following the Life Script

Some toxic social norms aren’t new, but that doesn’t mean we can’t reject them anyway. 

The biggest one is the life script. Society tells us what to do and how to do it. It demands we go to school, find a job, get married, buy a house in the suburbs, have 2.5 kids, work until we’re 62, then retire to a life of cozy comfort on the golf course. 

I don’t know about you, but half of that sounds awful. Society’s life script keeps us trapped in a life we didn’t actually want. 

But the good news is you don’t have to follow it. You can live how you want. 

Having Kids

I mentioned having kids in the life script, but it’s such a massive social expectation that it deserves its own section. 

Despite all the pressure to procreate, it’s perfectly valid not to want kids. Millennials and younger generations are opting out of parenthood at record rates, highlighting a massive rejection of this once-mandatory social norm. 

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t think having kids is toxic. I think society’s push for everyone to have kids, even those who don’t want to or probably shouldn’t, is toxic. 

Parenthood is hard. Nobody should be pushed into it. 

How to Reject Toxic Social Norms

Social norms are “norms” for a reason. Everyone follows them, which creates peer pressure for us to do the same. 

But you don’t have to. 

You can reject any social norm you don’t want to follow, whether it’s toxic or not. 

Here’s how. 

Learn Who You Are

A lot of us follow along with toxic social norms because we don’t really know who we are. We’re not confident enough in ourselves to do our own thing and buck tradition. 

Take a journey of self-discovery. Figure out what you really want. Determine your core values and your biases, your strengths and your weaknesses, your desires and your boundaries. 

Knowing yourself inside and out will help you reject social norms that don’t serve you. 

Question Everything

Part of learning who you are involves unlearning what society wants you to be. 

The world bombards us with subliminal messages about what we should want. Everything, from movies to advertisements, churches to political parties, parents to teachers, leaves us with a tiny little message about what we should want. 

The vast majority of it is propaganda designed to shape your outlook. Stop blindly believing it. Question everything about the message. What are they trying to get you to believe and why? Who ultimately benefits? Is it what you want?

You’ll naturally start rejecting social norms when you realize they’ve originated from someone trying to control you for their benefit. 

Be True To Yourself

Rejecting social norms is easy when you’re true to yourself. 

Examine what you want out of life, and go after it unapologetically. 

Being true to yourself means living your life your way, regardless of what society thinks. I think you’ll be happier for it.